That Dumbass Bird

That dumbass bird that shit on my porch last night
That dumbass bird that shit on my porch last night
That was a song Ben Young wanted me to write
He gave me that line on the phone one night

He told me "try to write the world's worst song,
Something stupid, and with that line, well, you can't go wrong"
That dumbass bird that shit on my porch last night
That dumbass bird that shit on my porch last night

But now that bird has flown
Oh, into the concealing light
Into the west, into white
Beyond the sunset, beyond the night
Too soon, too late to say goodbye
And I want to talk with you again

We used to talk about ignorant right wing stupidity
The horror in the news and the political absurdity
How reality has become its own satiric parody
More ridiculous than any far fetched comedy

Keeping up with The Colbert Report and The Daily Show
And how for all our searching, well, we still don't know
We keep hitting that wall of "but I just can't KNOW"
It's always "I just don't know"

And now that bird has flown
Oh, into the concealing light
Into the west, into white
Beyond the sunset, beyond the night
Too soon, too late to say goodbye
And I want to talk with you again

I told him how I loved "Surfin' Cadillac"
And he replied "Oh, that was a piece of crap,
The only thing I liked it about was" and then he laughed,
"Was I got you and Earl to sing 'shooby dooby ahhh'"

Well, I opened my notebook just the other day
And there staring up at me from an empty page
Was the one line he made sure I had written down
The last thing he said to me and that I write down

It said:

That dumbass bird that shit on my porch last night
That dumbass bird that shit on my porch last night
That dumbass bird that shit on my porch last night
That dumbass bird that shit on my porch last night
That dumbass bird that shit on my porch last night
That dumbass bird that shit on my porch last night